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| Photo from http://www.pinoygigs.com |
I went for afternoon chai- my third for the day. Just as there’s an atmosphere of unlimited
peace in Madhuban, there’s unlimited chai.
I went late so I can be alone, eat
in silence and also (hush tone) so I don’t have to share the cereals I brought
from the Philippines.
You see, though
the university’s modern and fully equipped, it still rests on top of the
mountain where there’s no huge groceries or department stores. There’s a small
store inside the campus, and a village market nearby but I’m still in rural
India. There’s really no way for me to
get my favorite boxed cereal so I scrimped on it and share little.
The Test
As I was sipping my chai and munching my oh-so-precious
cereal, an Indian lady sat opposite me.
Her badge shows me that she’s just visiting the campus for the day. (Most of the students billeted in Gyansarovar
are foreigners.) I smiled to greet her
but then I quickly bowed down and focused on my snack. I didn’t want to talk or share, remember? She spoke in Hindi, and pointed to what I am
eating. I looked up to acknowledge her
but pretended not understand what she meant.
We ate in silence for a minute.
She must not like the popped rice she was given (meals & snacks are
served in the university), that she again inquired where I got my snack. I
dismissed her for the second time, moving my head to and fro while giving her a
quizzical look as if I don’t know what she wanted. She stopped asking but she never stopped
staring at my food.
The Talking Conscience
I tried to ignore her but a voice inside says, “You’re
practicing meditation so you can get in touch with your real self and your values. Yet here you are refusing to be generous.” I ranted like a brat, “But there’s nowhere I can get
another box here!” “True, but this is your
chance to practice what you’ve been studying.”, the voice replied. “I don’t want to give with a heavy heart”, I
blurted back. The voice was persistent,
“Then don’t. Give willingly. You see,
there’s really no point studying about spirituality and meditation if you don’t
live by it.” I was stumped.
The little voice inside my head
is right. What’s the point of all the
study and silence, if it doesn’t show in my dharna (practice). The Indian lady in front of me is not the
most charming of people. To be honest, I’m a little annoyed by her assertiveness. She’s a stranger and I feel that I don’t have
any obligation to her. But I have a
responsibility to be true to who I am. I
really am a generous spirit. Holding on
to my cereals disprove that. I am a
peaceful soul and my not liking her says otherwise. I am loving and being apathetic to another
kindred spirit shows that I am not.
After being jolted, I opened my
bag, removed the cereal box and filled-up her small bowl. She received it and ate away. There was no thank you or even a smile. It’s ok, I learned my lesson. Thank you, Indian lady!
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| Photo from http://inerg.blogspot.com |
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