Dearest Fear

image from sailboatstory.com

Dearest Fear,

I sneaked one past you.  Ha!  Make it a double ha ha! :)  

I was able to jumpstart this project with the greatest team in the whole wide universe without your interference.

thesparkproject.com

Yay!  I filled my heart so much excitement there was no room for you.    

However, now that we’re nearing the end I see you creeping in.

“What if you don’t reach 100% of your funding goal for the documentary?”

“What if you run out of funds and you can’t even give honorarium to your mentors?”

“What will happen to the students after your 12 sessions?”

My head’s getting dizzy with all the what-ifs.  My heart's thumping very fast it’s zooming way past it’s normal speed limit.  

Just when I’m about to lose my calm, I heard a whisper.

“Trust”, it says.

“Trust that help will come.”

“Trust that everything will pan out.”

“Trust in the goodness of people.”

image from psychologytoday

Then, I waved you goodbye.

I know you’re there to protect me but I don’t need you right now, Fear.   I will be ok- even if everything I’ve built comes crushing down before my very eyes.  

I understand that I am not the project.

But I saw how deeply I can love and give because of this project.

I experienced the generosity and passion of like-minded souls who ran the race with me.  

Thank you for saying yes to this Dane Raymundo, Dana Salonga, Nory San Juan, Karl Jingco, Monique Pereda, Raisa Perez, Rod Valencia, Louie Payawal, Mige Espena, Yenny Tjioe Saw, Jenn Maliwanag, Aticia Reyes, Ma’am Arlene Sarmiento, Ron Tayon, Cathy Gargaritano, Melvin Ayag, Mhel Almario, Christine Mislang, Krishna Quemado, Tricia Ricasio, Anne Casten, Joshua Siscar, Charissa Carlos, Dominic Cheoc, Christa Del Rosario, Mae Ignacio, Felix Gaco, Inee Co and Paola Policarpio.

I witnessed the growth of the students in the last 9 weeks.  I am affirmed that they can do great things given the right training and opportunity.

SPED students' pursuit of the arts

If we just focus on their strengths and gifts, and nurture these souls with acceptance and kindness they can escape the small box society puts them in.  

I learned my lessons.  

Fear, at this point that’s all that matters.

Goodbye!

                                                      

                                                           Sincerely,

                                                              

                                                                    Karen

meditation by Release Your Wings

An Attempt at Vulnerability

"You always put on a brave front", said an old friend.  

"You know, it's ok to be vulnerable too.", she advised.

"I'm a softie. I can't even raise my voice even when I'm angry.", I countered.

"True but you're stubborn as hell.  Once you set your mind on something, you do everything to make it happen", she argued.

"So, what's wrong with that?", I asked.

"You don't need to do everything.  It's ok to ask for help.", she replied.

So, here's my attempt at vulnerability. Let me tell you a story...

image from parkinsinteriors.com

Three years ago, Special Achievers, an NGO for children and youth with disability I co-founded with colleagues Dana Salonga, Dane Raymundo and Pey Abdulwahid went to San Jose Elementary School, a public school in Rodriguez, Rizal and organized a fair for their SPED students in cooperation with Natimars Foundation. 

We brought in athletes, visual artists, clay artists, musicians and dancers in the school.  The students were allowed to try out the different arts and sports with the supervision of their parents and SPED teachers.

* All photos by Cris Legaspi


It was truly a fun-filled day! 

After a month, we came back and talked to the parents about what they think of the program and they told us how their children’s self-confidence and independence improved as a result of the activity.

“My son baked clay artworks in the oven during the fair.  After your activity, he would use the oven toaster home.  Eventually, he even helped out in cooking.”, related a mom.

Given the positive response of the parents and the enthusiasm we saw in the kids’, we promised to go back and run the program for at least a year.

“We just need to work on our funding.”, we told them.

However, we've never gotten around to it.  

Other projects came in the way. We also got busy with our day jobs. (At the moment, Special Achievers is a passion project and the core team are all volunteers.)

This year marks the third year since we promised, “We shall return”.

This promise haunts us every now and then.  So, we told ourselves that we will make it happen this year- no matter what.

Special Achievers received some funding- but not enough for the logistics required for us to travel to far flung Rodriguez, Rizal.  So for now, we opted to run the program in a school in the metro.

We were able to organize a great team, half of which took a massive pay cut and half of which are volunteers- but all committed to make the project happen.

Special Achievers brought in professionals in dance, music, visual arts, creative theatre and chocolate making at San Antonio National High School, a public school in Makati to train select SPED students.

SPED teachers, volunteer occupational therapists and speech pathologists collaborate with and assist the mentors.

The parents were also consulted and given free training for four sessions prior to the start of the program.

We have enough to run the program for 12 sessions- but we need more funding to finish the documentary so this small program can reach the world.

We’ve stretched, negotiated, settled and practically did everything we could to make it happen- but it’s still not enough.

We’ve been told, "If you think you've done everything you could, then do something more,”

And so now, we ask you, “Can you please help us help children and youth with disability?"   

https://www.thesparkproject.com/project/may-kagalingan-a-documentary-of-sped-students-pursuit-of-the-arts

This is our something more.

                                          thesparkproject.com