|Painting by Marina Petro|
I was eating dinner by my lone self in a huge hall (imagine a portion of Hogwarts dining hall, uhmm...more or less a quarter of it). I only switched on the bulb directly above me and kept the corridor lights dim.
Adjacent the area is the foyer enclosed by a glass window which allowed me to view the garden outside. I caught a glimpse of someone in white moving in the garden. "That's weird", I thought. I knew that everybody's meditating upstairs. I squirmed on my seat to directly face the window 5 feet away. The lady in white stared at me. I quickly shifted my position and turned away. In my peripheral view, I saw the lady move as well. I faced the window again. She did the same. At this point, I was amazed that I'm not shrieking my lungs out. (Has meditating made me this calm?) Slowly, I moved closer and looked intently to gaze at my own face reflected on the glass window.
I realized that in life, the scariest thing of all is facing my own shadow. Before, I would do all sorts of things to escape it- play, party, work, sleep, watch tv, work some more. When I'm alone, the thoughts of what happened, what could have been, what if, and what will happen just kept on coming. I would drown the voice in my head with incessant busyness or sleep to escape.
It's easier to just move away from it. Or so I thought.
The issues just kept on piling up and and sooner or later it hounded me. End result, my life got stuck then it spiralled down. I felt lost and empty. When I hit rock bottom, I turned to spirituality.
There, I learned how to face my own demons, hold it by its horns, and purl it around before throwing it into oblivion. End result: a significant decrease of baggage thus I now tread through life lightly and happily as I focus on what really matters.