How to be a princess without marrying a prince

image from huffingtonpost

An alternate title for this is, "How to be a prince without marrying a princess" (‘cause it can go either way). ;)

There’s a lot of talk about the recent royal wedding of late.  Well, I have news for you.  You can be a royal, too!

My Teacher tells me if I can truly understand and practice raja yoga meditation I can be the king (or queen) of my self and I can rule over my sense organs, and the faculties of my spirit: mind, intellect and nature (sankaras).  Then, I can be free of the clutches of the external or the chaos of the world. 

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“The first power you have to have

is power over yourself”, 
my Teacher always tells me.

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"Royalty simply means sovereignty- the ability to fully be in command of yourself.  Then, you can harness the second power- to serve."

"In essence, the function of royalty is to help others.”, my Teacher shares.

I’ve always been fascinated with the idea of a kingdom since I was young.  Little did I know that in the world of spirituality, my subjects are my eyes, nose, mouth, ears, hands and my physical body along with my inner world- mind, intellect and nature (sanskara).

Over the years, I’ve developed easy strategies to rule over my subjects:

image from lastlemon.com

1.  Let go of waste

Years ago, I’ve observed that my eyes like to watch stories of other people and other places.  Then, my mind wanders off to these visual imagery.  My weak intellect cannot discipline the childish mind so it lets it squander my time.  The lazy nature I have supports the idle mind and so the childish mind rules.

Eventually, I realized that it does not serve my spirit to let my eyes and mind rule me.  Gradually, I decreased listening to the wants of my mind which in turn made my intellect stronger.  The more I say no, the more the rational part of me (intellect) wins.  In the end, I was able to let go of my addiction.

image from chopra.com

2.  Start and end my day with a spiritual practice

“The early morning hours are the best time of the day.”, says my Teacher.

  
So, I start my day with a 30 minute meditation.  It has helped me stay grounded in the last 9 years.

  

In the same way that I take care of my physical body daily- bathing, eating and sleeping, my Teacher tells me it’s necessary to nurture my spirit every single day as well.

  

“Take a spiritual bath twice daily.”, my Teacher admonishes.

  

As such, I make it a point I wrap up the day with 30 minutes of meditation, as well.

  

image from ici.radio-canada

  

3.  Keep spaces for silence, inspiration or affirmation during the day     

  

It wasn’t easy for me to step into silence, at first.  Yes, I can keep my mouth shut in an instant but my intellect (the rational part of me) finds it hard to stop the chattering of the mind right away.  So initially, I relied on music to tie my mind and heart (also known as intellect) together.

  

When I feel weak, I remember Mulan, my favorite Disney princess.

When someone doesn’t like me, I play "Let it Be" in my head

And, India Arie's "I Am Light" can immediately transport me to that space beyond form and matter.

  

I actually have a playlist or affirmation list for all the times in between- the minutes in my day when my mind doesn’t need to focus or concentrate.

    … while taking a shower

    … while washing my hands

    … while cooking

    … while on the road

    … while walking 

    … while eating

    ... while waiting

I once clocked in all my times in between in a day.  I averaged 8 hours!  Therefore, I can never say I don’t have time to take care of my spirit.    

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"The first power is the power 

to control the self.”, says my Teacher.

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That’s the first step to sovereignty, a.k.a. royalty, a.k.a. freedom.

So, I take mindful steps to be free from the dictates of others, demands of society, turbulence of the world and even the chaos of my own inner world.  How about you?  What price do you pay to be free? 

meditation by Release Your Wings

It's ok

photo by Nory San Juan

I must have said this line a hundred times in the 2-day return journey back home.


It's ok that the brother who will bring us to the airport is 30 minutes late.


It's ok we had to wait for more than an hour to be picked up for a day trip in Delhi before the next flight.


It's ok we missed our flight to Manila and had to wait another 2 hours for the next flight.


In between, several other mishaps happen that I had to tell myself again and again, "It's ok".  


I wasn't merely uttering the line through gritted teeth.  It's coming from a space of awareness and understanding.   


I could have questioned why & how come?


But, it's a waste of time & energy.


I understand that the world is old & most of the souls in it are old, too.  Like an old person, things are not working the way it should. Uncertainty is the name of the game now.


It is what it is.


A lot of things are beyond my control.


The only thing I can control is my reaction to people and situations.


I can remain an observer and be detached from the situation even though I'm in the midst of it (power to withdraw).


I can stop complaining & questioning. Instead, I can look at what the scenario is teaching me. (power to pack up).


I can remain calm and accept people & situations for who & what they are without judgment (power to tolerate).


I can still hold good wishes for everyone & see the benefit despite the seeming chaos (power to accommodate.)


I can stand in front of an ugly scenario & take it on.  I am steadfast and strong (power to face).


I can see things clearly and decide whether I have to tolerate a situation or assert myself (power to judge).


I can bring out the specific virtue or power I need in a given situation (power to discern).


I keep my peace & spread vibrations of peace in the  atmosphere- no matter what (power to cooperate).


If there's anything I learned of late it is this...

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I don't live in a perfect world 

(even though I wish I do).  

I live in an old world.  

Mishaps and uncertainties will happen 

and so I must use all the powers 

I've accumulated in introspection 

& meditation to breeze through it.

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Om shanti.



P.S.  My yogi friends and I will be conducting a youth retreat this May 5-6 at Tagaytay Retreat Center.  You may register
online here.  

Day 7: I chose sleep

Today, I had a choice between more yoga or more sleep.  

I chose sleep- not once but twice!  And, I’m very happy with my decision.

image from preraphaelitepaintings

I had a chance to go to my favorite meditation spot after the early morning class and afternoon nap time but I made a pass for it.  (All departments close down around here from 2pm-4pm for nap time. Super like!)     

Sometime last week, I woke up at dawn realizing that I love myself.  Finally!!!  


I’ve been working on it for years.  You see,  I can pass for a martyr.  It’s very natural for me to think of others first before myself.  Sometimes I volunteer too much, I don’t have a rest day in the week.  Or I help everyone else, I end up feeling very tired.  I can hyperfocus on a project, I lose myself in it.

image from strong4pole.com

So, I had to train myself to think of me- first and foremost.  This entails learning to say no to some people and projects, arranging my schedule so I have ample time for rest and pauses, and focusing on nurturing my spirit above all.  

Also, I created a new habit of putting me first- even if other people do not approve of it.  (This was difficult for me 'cause I'm a pleaser).  

Choosing sleep over yoga is not the popular choice in a university for meditation.  I did not come 3,198 miles to simply sleep.  But, today it is choice that says that I love myself and I choose my well-being over being liked.    

meditation by Release Your Wings