Don't trust your feelings

image from easymeditation

"Are you saying that I should not even be happy?", I asked one of my classmates from London who's an expert in being 'emotionally free' (I know, it's a big word. I couldn't grasp it as well. )

"The word should is the problem", she patiently explained.  "We're so used to shoulds and shouldn'ts.  What I am saying is, we have to allow ourselves to be where we are in our journey and we have to give that same space to others as well."

"What do you mean?", I asked.

"People nowadays are ruled by their emotions.  For example, for us who are on the path of self-development, all too often we are upset with ourselves because we are not where we want to be in terms of progress.  Do you think getting upset will help us?"

"No", I quickly replied.  "All the more that we'll get stuck", I added.

"Correct.  Aside from that, it is very easy to get upset with others.  This one did not do this.  That one did that in this manner.  Do you think that's helpful?"

"No.  I've actually experienced being judged and it felt as though there are invisible cobwebs in the air which constrains me.  I feel pressured which makes it more difficult for me to change."

"Therefore, since the slightest irritation isn't beneficial, there's no need to go there.  What helps me a lot are these three buzz words: ACCEPTANCE, TRUST & FLOW."

"So, you mean a lot of space.", I clarified.

"Exactly", she retorted.

"I think it's the same with the positive feelings, too.  I was told of a story of Dadi Gulzar watching the sunset with the meditation students from Baguio.  All the students were oohing and aahing, extolling how beautiful the view is.  Dadi with a flat affect merely said, "It is good."", I countered.

"But that doesn't mean that the students were bad.  That's simply where they are.", she commented.

"Yeah, respect every being and where they are in their journey, right?  But, I think being happy with the sunset today can sway the students.  If the sunset is not that good the next day, they'll miss it and feel sad.", I said.

"I think you're getting it.  The thing with feelings is it can swing from one end to the other without warning.  It is very fickle.  If you rely on this alone, then you too become like a pendulum swinging from one end to the other.", she explained.

"What should I trust then?", I asked.

"Trust your intuition, your intellect, your better judgment.", she answered.