It is ugly
I tell you
It can make an energizer bunny
Into a zombie
It is a thief
It steals the spark
In the eyes of its victims
And leaves them in the dark
It is like a quicksand
It draws them deep
Into the mud of what ifs and what could haves
Of whys and how comes
It is a predator
It kills its prey
Leaves them lifeless
And in coma
I tried to shake her out of it
I shouted as loud as I can so she would wake up
I begged her to see the bright side
I gave her the best advice I can find in my toolbox
But she was in so deep
Nothing could bring her back to life
Not even the man in white suit
Or the potions he recommends
“It cannot happen to her!”
I protested
I never thought I am capable of anger
Until that moment
For a time
I kept my distance
I could not stand being in the same space
I refused to see her deteriorate before my eyes
It hurts
Because she is the best among us
She can rule the world
If she wants to
I cry
Because she’s so close to me
I know her lofty dreams and ambitions
And I believe in her with all my heart
After a long while
I’ve learned
To be present when I’m needed
And move away when she needs space
I remind myself to keep mum
When she complains
And just listen
Even when I have a long speech prepared
I try
To understand her instead
She looks well
But deep inside she’s broken
I saw once
How love heals
I will try that again
Along with faith that she will come back to life
P.S. If you are also going through something or if you simply want to take a retreat, this might help. You may register online at www.tagaytayretreatcenter.org
