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Well, I decided not to board the plane 2 weeks prior to my scheduled departure. I just knew that my body cannot handle the long trip ( just for now. my doctor says I'll live. :) ). I sat down and meditated to confirm my decision. My spirit agreed, it is the right thing to do.
It was a big lost for me though. It felt as though I missed my Christmas since it is the one thing I look forward to every Madhuban season just as a child's giddy about the-most-wonderful-time-of-the-year. And, I have never missed a single season (the university opens its doors to foreign students from October to April) since I became a student of meditation. I also prepared for it for 6 months prior to the supposed trip. As in any reputable school, students had to qualify to be admitted. Not to mention, the thousands of pesos which just flew out the window when I missed my flight (just learned that promo fares cannot be refunded and it costs twice as much when you opt for rebooking).
Inspite of all that, I wasn't sad, mad or disappointed. There was simply a calm and gentle acceptance of the situation.
It is what it is. No qualms, resistance, or objection. Oh my gosh! I think I finally imbue "om shanti" (I am a peaceful soul).