Tuesday, May 29, 2018

#WalangForever


image from behance.net


I was at the grocery one day when I overheard a group of merchandisers (the ones lining up the stocks) arguing whether “may forever" (relationships last) or walang forever (relationships don’t last). 

It was a long debate which also got me thinking.

I couldn't pick a side though- until of late.

Recently, I’ve been listening to classes of Charlie Hogg, Brahma Kumaris Director for Asia and the Pacific.

He point-blankly declares "walang forever".  Well, not exactly in those words (For one, he doesn’t speak Tagalog. :) hehe)

He explains, 

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“Here’s a huge dilemma in human life and that is no relationship is permanent.  Whether it’s change, whether it’s time, whether it’s separation, whether it’s death- the object of my love goes."
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But, we're immensely invested in our relationships that we often dismiss the fact that these relationships end- in one way or another.  So, we feel lost or abandoned when our love ones leave us or we go in a frenzy looking for the next one (or "the one" for some) .

He suggests,

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"Explore the one relationship that is permanent- that is always there.”
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He is referring to the relationship with the self. 

However, he’s not implying that we don't get involved in any other relationship or ditch our family and friends.  He’s merely reminding us that amidst the noise of our own mind, the chaos of the world and our relentless search for true love, we forget who we really are and who we belong to.


image from us.brahmakumaris

The Soul

"Statistics show that 80% of us believe that we are more than our body.”, says Bro. Charlie.  


However, he states that we don’t often experience that and points out that we have to start by practicing self-awareness.

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“When I’m aware of my (true) self, when it seeps through my being… it's like coming home to a place inside where I feel so comfortable.” 
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“I don’t have to try to impress anybody, I don’t have to put a pressure on myself to look good, to be noticed, to be out there.”

"I just have to be aware of who I am and naturally, I begin to taste the original feeling of my self."

"I am a soul. Not really a male or female or Asian or European and all the labels that divide people in this world.  Reality is that I am a soul.", Hogg reveals

Now, this self, the soul has three faculties- mind, intellect and the subconscious.


image by kiwiTACHAN

The Overthinking Mind


"So many conversations are going concurrently in our heads… Sometimes with others- sharing our feelings with others, trying to prove my point. Sometimes with myself- you know that inner voice disapproving of myself. "Why did I say that?  Why did I do that?" Sometimes conversations with situations. “What's happening?  Why isn’t it happening.  It shouldn’t be happening."  At other times, fantasy conversation with the person in our dreams.”

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"It seems that our mind is constantly in conversation in some direction- it never stops." 
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"Seeing this mind that overthinks in these elongated conversations, I think we crave peace inside. We crave stillness.  We crave a mind that rests. We crave silence. But, I think at the same time, we fear silence." 

 
"Because the conversations have a purpose. The noise of the mind has a purpose.  It stops me from going deep into my truth- to understand really who I am.", shares Hogg.  



image from pinsdaddy

 The Intellect: the wise guard of the mind


"What I’ve found recently, I begin to think of my mind as a sacred space inside.”, Bro. Charlie goes on.


"The image that I have is a beautiful crystal bowl- absolutely clean and clear.  Full of clean, pure water.  This is the original state of my mind." 

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"Wisdom is to keep the negative and wasteful conversation out of my sacred space."
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"This sacred space has many gateways into it- one is my ears.  My pool (inside) can be so calm and quiet (but) one conversation of few words or comment, can enter through the gateway of my ears and my conversation in my mind becomes heated and angry.  I see something which is not fair or unjust, the gateway of my eyes allow the conversation in my mind to become one of great judgement and criticism."

"We need wisdom to protect this sacred space.  Then, I can have the most elevated conversation of all (with myself and the Divine)."






image from uncut-news

The subconscious:  the recordings of my past

"Have you ever wondered why even if you have a strong resolve to be peaceful or calm, suddenly anger or frustration comes out?” asks Hogg.


"Emotions are like little windows into my past.  All the experiences of the past are imprinted on my memory track.  We have millions of experiences sitting in our subconscious like packages sitting inside of me. Someone said something and it triggers this little package, it opens & rushes into my mind. It’s like you become an instrument to open something from my past"

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Emotions are like little windows into my past
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He tells a story of a woman who felt very rejected after someone commented about her life.  She was so hurt that she went quiet for months.  Then, she realized that the only thing the person did was press a button which is already inside of her. 


Hogg advises, "We need self-awareness to understand that all of us carry our history in our subconscious.  Otherwise, we wonder why a little thing happens and my reaction to it is so huge... My past is influencing my present life."


image from valuepreneurs.org

Putting it all together


Hogg explains 3 essential S in spirituality.

"Spiritual intelligence is the wisdom to build a rich, loving relationship with me."

"Self-awareness is to take full responsibility for how I think."

"Spirituality is carrying this self-awareness in my life."  

"The more I practice, the more it influences everything in my life even the way I relate to people."

"Someone with self-awareness, when they meet somebody and that person does something or says something that triggers something in me, the one with self-awareness will look at the self and say, “Oh look at that, I reacted in this way. It’s increasing my learning about myself and my own story", rather than instantly jumping and projecting it back on the other person."

"One with self-awareness starts to take responsibility and begins to observe that what all relationships do is to trigger what is already inside of me."

"One with self-awareness learns that if I know the value of another, I can come close."

"It is also knowing that we have to do something for ourselves (first)," Bro. Charlie discloses.



Charlie Hogg, Brahma Kumaris Director for Asia and the Pacific will be giving a FREE talk at Onstage Theatre, Greenbelt 1 on June 5, 7:00-9:00pm. You are warmly invited!

Register online here.









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